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Iva 1:10

Hi, and welcome to a new episode of the Mom Bosses Abroad podcast. We are here today with Midori Verity. And we are so excited that she's here joining us to talk a little bit about how we can work on that pesky overwhelm and increase success with a goal’s roadmap. So Midori, we are so excited to have you here. Welcome. 

 

Midori 1:49

Thank you. I am so excited to be here as well with you women who are around the world. How fun is this?

 

Desiree 1:56

I know it totally is! I love connecting just with everyone like this right in the digital space. Yeah, so Midori, when entrepreneurs want to hit results without mental exhaustion, they work with you as you're a serial entrepreneur with three decades of vetted experience so you definitely know what it takes to start to grow and rapidly scale a business with ease plus as a mom, you know the added responsibilities that go into being both a successful business owner and a parent as well. So Midori, whether you're consulting with startups to Fortune 500 Silicon Valley giants, your unique approach has without fail, unlock the full potential and the entrepreneurs. You are also a well-recognized TV show host and highly sought after public speaker. We can't wait to get into this conversation would you like to share a little bit more about your journey and about what brought you to where you are today? 

 

Midori 3:03

Yeah, well, I guess since we're talking about being a mom, that's where it kind of starts. So when I first graduated college, we were in a recession and at that point, my husband and I decided you know what, let's just start a business. Why not? And so, we started a business and it grew really quickly. That's when Google AdWords came out and the business grew fast. But then we had kids and things got complicated, right? And so anyway, it was about 10 years. Into the business when I just got to this point where I couldn't take it anymore. I was so stressed out. I was so unhappy and fast forward. It just led me on this journey of looking for answers on how I was going to get out of what I was doing. And anyway, somewhere along the way, I figured out this whole goal mapping system, and what it did was it helped me get out of the business I was in and helped me launch other businesses and now I've used it for numerous businesses and I help other people. But what it really did well, that just helped me get super focused when I felt like there was no focus available, when I felt like I was always tapped out. And so that's that is how I got into goal mapping.

 

Iva 4:27

That's so fascinating Midori and, you know, it's one of those things that I guess as entrepreneurs, you you want to get in quickly into that space when you're starting out. Because everybody knows like, ‘Oh, you have to put a business plan together, right, like I have to have something in writing that really sets more or less the goalposts that I need to reach. And so, how would you say having this, you know, this goal map is different from having a business plan or like a strategy type of document? Because it can become very confusing, which one is which or which one do I really need to give me that clarity?

 

Midori 5:16

Yeah, it's much different than just a business plan where you have everything in there_your financials and all kinds of other things. But when you are a mom, with young children, as I'm looking at you Desi with which you're trying to juggle all these different things, less is more, and that's what I found. And so, with how it's broken down, it's just really simple. At the very top, you put in your big goals, where do you want to go? Why are you in business? What do you want to achieve? What are those stretch goals? And then you come down and you break it into 90 Day bite-size increments. So those are called your approach goals and the approach goals lead up to your summit goals. And the reason why I love this so much is that it just helps you get laser focused on that short period of time. So it doesn't feel so consuming and overwhelming.

 

Iva 6:11

Right. And I agree with you on that part, because it is very much how the mind is conditioned to think that time is relative, but we also like to play tricks on ourselves. So what I mean by that is, we always want to start off from a clean slate, let's say January 1, and you know, this year is the year, that feeling, right? But then December 31st rolls around and not much happened like not much got done. And it seems like 12 months is a bit of a long way that allows for a lot of possible distractions or situations or I don't know pandemics, you know, to come in and really disrupt what you set out to do at the beginning of the year. So, I love the the approach of saying well, 90-day bite size approaches are much better because you really see more tight and accountable to take a look and say, ‘Hey, time is ticking and I really have to be more laser focused in everything that I do more intentional’, if you will.

 

Desiree 7:23

And also having like me here, with the baby literally attached to me right this moment. It's really difficult to plan in the long term sense, right? It's, I don't know like when we started recording again after I had Gia, it was easy. She was a baby. She was sleeping a lot. You know, I would just quickly breastfeed her and all is good. But now she's mobile. And so it changes so it's really, we've got to take it a little bit more step by step and, and not plan like necessarily the whole year but take it like you said in these bite sized pieces. I like that.

 

Midori 8:04

Yeah, there's a lot of studies out there that proves that 90-day increments, regardless of what your situation is the most success when people are the most successful for the same reasons we're talking about whether you have children or you don't have children. Mentally, it's a lot easier to accomplish those 90 Day goals when you're thinking out a year. It seems so far right? It seems like he's got all kinds of time so it's tougher, but when you can get really focused, it helps and so instead of focusing in so the other thing that I like about the system, is it shows you what you need to be concentrating on. And as entrepreneurs, we're wearing so many different hats, right? And then you add in children into that mix, and it's just exasperates everything it amplifies all of our all of our needs and all of our duties. So when you we have a laser focus and you're only focused on three to five things in a quarter or a 90 days. It makes it much more tangible. And so, when you're looking at okay, what do I need to get done this week? What do I need to get done today? You know that if you get these three things done today, you're good.

 

Iva 9:15

Yeah, that is totally true. I read somewhere that the average adult makes about I don't know if it's 35,000 decisions a day, or about that. But I believe that moms and mompreneurs we make at least triple the amount. We always have to be making decisions and sometimes on the go without having all the information. Is this putting the baby down for a nap right now like the decision. Am I going to regret it later on and so forth. Right and it's snowballs. So it's  fantastic to be able to get rid of decision fatigue, which is I think, is the thing, right? You read also very successful business people that they have the same outfit day in and day out, right? Because it's one less decision that you need to make what am I going to wear? Will it match? In my case, I'm a bit colour-blind. So it's even worse because I really have to pay attention to the colors that I use. And so having this this goal roadmap is really a very effective way as you say to bring yourself back into okay, what really is moving the needle? Right? What is the decision that really counts without wasting my energy on something that it really doesn't matter if it's pasta for dinner or chicken, right? It's when it comes to my business goals. That's what I'm absolutely

 

Midori 10:45

Yeah. And then when you're that focused on it, like you said, you're focused on the things that are the needle turner's right. And so all these other decisions, maybe you're not for whatever reason, the kids aren't feeling well or they don't take a nap or whatever happens which is a reality or the school gets cancelled and there's a pandemic, then adjust and this is part of being an entrepreneur in general, is you have to be able to adjust but when you are focused on less things, it makes it much easier to do that and to feel mentally. We need to have something that creates momentum. So when we're focused on just a few things, it makes it feel like we are moving forward and it's less stressful. 

 

Desiree 11:31

It is such a motivation as well like it really fuels my energy as well when I say wow, I got this done. I'm ready for more you know it just like really fuels me, because there's so many times I've just gone to bed and like what have I done today, even though I've done a lot, but I didn't feel because I didn't have it on a roadmap. I didn't have anything to take off or a guide to follow. So I lost track of what I've actually achieved you know where I could have gone to bed with a peace of mind, but rather I felt unaccomplished so yeah, it's definitely a big mindset accelerator as well. 

 

Iva 13:12

In terms of mindset, I mean in terms of certain tips that you can share with us mompreneurs of how to approach distractions because we all agree that they will happen and we have to factor them in right we have the goal roadmap but we also have to account for as you say, life, life is also happening around us. So when that is the case, what are some tips that you can share that can help us really navigate through the distractions without feeling that we are failing or that feeling more even more overwhelmed that we have to put something on the side because now we have to deal with an issue that might be very urgent and also feeling that we're still on track on where we want to go.

 

Midori 14:01

Yeah, there's a couple of different things right there. So, one is keeping perspective. Right? How important is it really? You know, when you really think of the big scope of it, my kids are now grown up. And so now it's much easier let me just tell you, it's much easier. When you look back it's putting things into perspective, how big of a deal is this really at this point? So, whether it's dealing with your children or whether it's dealing with your business, and then knowing ‘Okay, so I made progress here. And these are the things I'm going to focus on this weekend. I'm going to start over again tomorrow. Today was a tough day. I'm just going to start fresh tomorrow.’

 

The other thing that I still do today and that I recommend to all my clients is learning to control your breath. And that's such a grounding factor. So just learning how to breathe in, do it slowly and see it actually, visualize it as a cleansing calming thing. Because let's say you're having a tough morning with your kids. They're going crazy. They're running around, maybe it's raining all day. And then finally they sit down and they're watching a movie and you finally get a break and it's time for you to do business. In order for you to get anything productive down. You need to kind of center yourself again. And so it's that breath, and that will help kind of smooth things out of that. And it helps you move forward. 

 

Iva 15:32

I love that! We forget how important breathing actually is until we go into that space of possibly meditation or doing yoga or some other practice that really centers us and ground us. But as you say, it doesn't really have to be oh my god. Now I need to go to a yoga class on top of everything that I need to do. Is more having that reminder of saying just take five deep, long breaths and then move on. You can move on to the next thing or you can approach the situation differently. Right. And especially with our children I feel that we tend to forget about that part. Because they just trigger us. So especially with our little ones, I have little ones too. And so you're just like okay, deep breath, deep breath, okay, and then you're able to ride it out without having things escalate. So I love that.

 

Midori 16:30

Yeah. And we know as a from a business standpoint, the more that you can delegate out, the better. Yeah, so as you're growing your businesses, think about what you can delegate out and get creative. Can you do trades with someone else? What can you do? Fiverr’s a great platform that can really save you time. But it's important to find these little tools that you can use and put in your pocket to help you adjust and integrate your business. But from a bigger standpoint, I will say this: now that my kids are grown is that when my kids were younger, I was running around with my head cut off constantly. I was trying to be the perfect mom. I was trying to volunteer in school. I was working 50 to 60 hours a day Monday through Monday, and it was insane. It was an absolute insanity and then what happened is that stress sucked up my brain space you've been talking about brain energy. So that's what was happening was that not only was I spread so thin, but my brain space was absolutely consumed so I was getting less done anyway and then I was frustrated which is added to it. When you can break it down into these goals. And just focus on getting one big thing done a day, or possibly three depending on where your kids are. One, two or three things and everything else is gravy. And you just you tell yourself that you get into that habit. You want to move forward so much quicker than so many other people because of that laser focus and that mindset of just get this one to three things done. You're good to go.

 

Desiree 18:12

Exactly. Yeah, yeah. But even if you have done an episode also in the past and season one just about multitasking, we discussed that a little bit. Right and about how as moms, we definitely have to multitask and we were busting some of the myths out there what you should and shouldn't do, but it's very true what it comes down to. There are some things you can multitask with. But there are some things you cannot and you shouldn't either and there are that's why I love that you mentioned this laser focus and having this one thing that you need to get done. First of all, it'll motivate you it's done right it's one step. Closer on my roadmap there. But also, it's with more clarity. And it's with a lot less distractions because often we try to do too many things at once and I'm I have to remind myself personally of that every day. Yeah, yeah, don't tackle it. We have so many facets of our entrepreneur intrapreneurial business as well. We don't just have this podcast, we have our own companies. We have our own like collaborations, but it's like no, because and that's a big thing. You need to start accepting as well beforehand, right and I love that we have each other as like an accountability partner as well to be like, slow down. Let's discuss that tomorrow. That's a different topic. Let's just focus on that today. So I love that laser focus that that key word there.

 

Iva 19:44

And me, from what you were just sharing with us, the first part that you said, you know, having and keeping perspective, but also giving yourself that grace to you know, if today didn't go as planned. There's always tomorrow I can always do it better tomorrow, right? And I want to extract that from the conversation and highlight it because sometimes as mompreneurs when we're starting out and you are definitely a good 100 steps ahead of us right in terms of you know, being a mom_ already your children are older and also in terms of you know, where we can consider success and experience in the business that you built and the impact that it's had, which is amazing. So sometimes for mompreneurs that are still in the phase of growing and scaling their business, they might feel when they read about someone like you for example, that it will feel so like ‘wow, she has this you know, go getting attitude and she's like, oh like, rah rah rah. Let's go! She must be so driven’ and so you know, nothing can stop me which I know you do have but I liked that you're also bringing into highlight the fact that there's this soft, feminine energy that we cannot leave on the side because it is part of who we are as women. And most especially when we are combining business and raising children which is a very nurturing thing to do, and how to apply it to ourselves because we forget about that, we can be so harsh with our own selves, comparing ourselves to someone's almost like middle or ending, right like how ahead they might be in their journey. And somebody that is still starting out so we can be very harsh. And we can be very unforgiving as you say when we make mistakes, when we don't get it right. We just put all this pressure of saying like ‘oh no, but this shouldn't be this way, I should know better’. And so forth. So I love, I love that you're bringing that and to have that ability to combine both energies because they're both part of ourselves. So going back to you and again your how you came about to building this fantastic business and really helping other people achieve their goals. You You raised two boys while you were, you know, racy during your business full time. So is there anything else that you would like to share on how you were able to consistently do it without, you know, having this overwhelm and this sense of I'm going crazy in the process.

 

Midori 22:30

Okay, so let me just be totally clear. There was absolutely overwhelm. And there was absolutely the time when I was always feeling like I was going crazy. So, you know one thing that I teach my clients where I talk about a lot of times is we have seasons of our lives, right? And so with a season there's a beginning, and there's an end, and that's kind of the beautiful thing about it. So, you know for Des you have right now you're in that early season with your kids, they're young. Yeah, and then they will get to a point where they're moving on and they don't need you as much. So that's where grace really desk is so important is that enjoy it. That's what I wish someone would have really said to me and gotten clear to me is that enjoy that stage because it's going to pay off for the rest of your life. And if you don't get X, Y or Z done in your business, it doesn't really matter. It's just a season. Things will change. And then you get to the next season your kids get a little bit older, they're a little more independent, and then you can start doing a little bit more. Now my kids are older they're out of the house. One of them has their own business. The other one just graduated college. I'm in a new season where I can take off, you know, I'm 50 now and now I can put it as important in my heart in my time and I have less distractions. So, it's much easier to scale my business and put in the time. So remember the seasons. I was there too. It was not pretty. It was simply overwhelming. And that was just my season.

 

Iva 24:11

Yes, love it. And thank you. It's always as you say it's so much needed to have this reminder. Because it is true. I tend to say as moms we tend to compare our apple crumble to somebody else's tiramisu, and even the same thing to begin with. So as you say you are in a space and in a time where young children are not pulling at the hem of your skirt and saying like ‘Mommy, Mommy’ every five seconds. When you are in that season then it requires you to follow different things. And we love that you are really showing everyone how they're able to customize their roadmap, right? Because it's not the same for everyone. And, so it brings again, that layer. It's not a cookie cutter type of program or thing that you say well everybody's doing it this way. I also need to do it this way. But that you really can personalize that to your own needs and to your own situation in life.

 

Midori 25:19

Absolutely.

 

Desiree 25:20

Yeah. And I love as well that when we have that roadmap right? We also get out of this comparison game because like you said, right it's, it's I'm in a much different season right now. And I do often, you know, compare myself to other people. I've found myself doing that. Oh my god, they're doing so much and they're doing this. They just launched that and I am nowhere close to completing that but I have to realize that that's just not my season in life right now. And I need to enjoy those baby cuddles. And but I know that when I have this roadmap, it's I will feel accomplished because on that roadmap is going to be the goals that I need to achieve in my respective season. And there are not goals I need to achieve, you know, that are comparable with someone else that is much further ahead of me.

 

Midori 26:16

Right? Yeah, and it doesn't with comparisons, there's comparison syndrome, right. And so it really doesn't matter. There's always someone to compare yourself to. And if that's the game that you're playing, you'll always lose. And so, by having this focus and knowing where you're going, and being able to push aside the other things that maybe are not as important will help you get there faster and just and just have the mindset of this is what I'm achieving right now. This is the right thing for me at this time in my life, and things get easier. You know at 50+, I'm happier now than I ever was although I loved raising my kids and I have healthy happy children who are doing really well. But it's you know, each season has its gifts, right? And so, just kind of being aware of that and what I what I'm saying is, as I've gotten older, I've learned to relax into things a little bit more I've learned to keep perspective of what's really important for myself, for my family and for my business. And that awareness, just read, it takes off so much pressure, and it makes life so much more enjoyable.

 

Iva 27:32

Perspective is definitely the key word today and something that we fairly quickly forget about right in our striving to tick off all of those to do things on our to do list right? And we say hey, it's a ride. It's a ride weekend. I mean, it doesn't mean that you're going now to not have goals and not have ambitions and not one to accomplish things by certain dates. But it does mean as you say, to not put everything on the same priority basket, right, because not everything has the same weight. Yeah, that's a good one. So, Midori, you have a freebie for us today. Can you tell us a little bit about it and how can mompreneurs benefit from it? We will love to hear all the details.

 

Midori 28:24

Yeah, well, we've been talking all about goals and focusing and making our lives easier and really cutting out all that the distractions as much as we can. And so, what I love to do is offer my goal mapping framework, which is a whole training and it has the spreadsheets in there for the audience and it will make it easier for them to set up their summit goals and have their action steps and be able to print that focus for whatever stage they're in.

 

Desiree 28:59

Oh, fantastic. This is amazing. Thank you so much. We love this. I'm definitely downloading it straight away to me to that is we all need that. 

 

Iva 29:06

And Midori, what are you working on right now? 

 

Midori 29:14

Yeah, so we're just we're building out the business, the fuel the fire accountability groups where we use this goal setting framework, but I'm calling that out. And we're also building out an app, a goal setting app which helps us all you have to do is look at it you press the button and it tells you exactly what to do each day. 

 

Desiree 29:37

So amazing.

 

Iva 29:40

Game changer, for sure. Yeah, we can get right and we always have our phones with us. So it's even better because there's no way that you can miss that. Yes. 

 

Midori 29:53

Yeah, so that's coming out too. But yeah, so all they need to do it's really easy to go to website. And that's where you just download it right there and the training and the videos and the templates are all on the same spot.

 

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RESOURCES

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FEATURED GUEST

Midori Verity

When entrepreneurs want to hit results without mental exhaustion, they work with Midori. As a serial entrepreneur with three decades of vetted experience, she knows what it takes to start, grow, and rapidly scale a business with ease. Plus, as a mom, she knows the added responsibilities that go into being both a successful business owner and a parent. Whether she’s consulting with startups to Fortune 500 Silicon Valley giants, Midori’s unique approach has without fail unlocked the full potential in the entrepreneurs she coaches.  Midori is also a well-recognized TV show host and highly-sought-after public speaker.

Website https://www.fueltofire.co/

IG @midoriverity

FB https://www.facebook.com/fueltofirecoaching

Website: https://www.linkedin.com/in/midoriverity/

 

FREEBIE

Summit Goal-Mapping Framework

https://www.fueltofiregroups.com/goals/