Boredom Revisited | Ways to Help You Embrace It Ep 20
We are here today with Nicole George and she is going to tell us all about how to do some happiness activation. So Nicole- We're so happy and thrilled to have you here with us today.
Thank you so much for having me. It's so amazing to be across the pond from each other but yet having connected
Yes, yes, yes across time zones.
It is totally I think it's fascinating with this, you know, this type of group, this type of community, so it's really nice. Yeah. So Nicole, it's super great to have you here. Nicole. George is the editor-in-chief for the global magazine Sovereign and founder of the Intuitive Life Hub. And she realized in 2020, she was traveling down what she calls herself the Unchosen Path. Now it's a path that had been formulated and constructed by the others rules and expectations beliefs and all those stories out there. So this in essence, and formed her perception of life and current reality. And it wasn't until she fell into the world of intuition really through serendipity process, right? The internal guidance and universal co creation that she begun to realign herself to travel down, but she calls her golden path. So now through silver reign and Intuitive Life hub she supports women to stand in their power, claim their truest essence and find their own golden paths. So Nicole we can't wait to dive right in.
Yes. Tell us more about your journey and what is this golden path in terms of how it has created this new, I guess life for you, and how can you can also change the lives of, you know, other women that come into contact with you and what you are teaching others about it?
Yeah, thank you so much. So for over 18 years, I was in the nursing world. So as a nurse and then I went on to do leadership, and I found myself at the end of 2020 just completely burned out. And after looking at what my life looked at, I really realized through this serendipitous moment that I was living everyone else's life, right? You're supposed to grow up, go to college, get a job, get married, have kids buy a house, all these things, right. Right. And I'm not saying that I didn't necessarily want to do those things that I was truly following what I was informed by my family, my friends, what society was telling me to do and not listening to my internal guidance system. You know what? I have chosen a life with dogs. I absolutely love dogs, or would I have chosen a different life somewhere? We had I had my own intuition and internal guidance system. And so really in 2021 that was when I decided to birth if you will, The Intuitive Life Hub and Sovereign magazine to give women the opportunity to not only have a voice, but to have an internal guidance system again. And when you talk about my title as a happiness activator. I really want to be clear that my definition of happiness may be different than what you're expecting. Most people think that that means having joy in every moment or being happy or smiling. And that's not my definition, my depth my definition of happiness is actually recognizing when you're unhappy and finding the gifts in those moments, to help guide you back to happiness, right. And so part of having intuition and all of that is learning to hold the dualities of unhappiness and happiness because sometimes you can't get to that 10 of happiness without experiencing a one. And we can go more into the zone of happiness later if you'd like. Yeah,
That is so interesting. And again, it's true that happiness like all the other things you describe, again, it's this pre-defined word, and people have these expectations around what happiness means and does to you, or what it's supposed to create. Your right so thank you for sharing your definition with us. But yes, so what is the happiness zone then?
Yeah, so first, I'd like to give credit to Colin O’gravy, this concept came from him. And he was talking about he had a near death experience. And he was talking about how his near death experience helped him realize he was living in what he calls the four to six happiness zone. Which basically means that you are kind of living a monotonous life, if you will. You're not going quite outside your comfort zone. You're living in the status quo. You're on autopilot. You're getting up every day. It's kind of like Groundhog Day, and you're just repeating the same thing over and over and over again, right, that's kind of the four to six. You might have a little little joy or fun in there. But you're really not moving outside this window, right. And I was really activated by this thought and I said oh my gosh, what if most of us tried to strive to live between like the seventh and the 10th? And what would happen with that? So I created this happiness handbook for people to be able to kind of do a life map first to number and it's free for everyone. It's on our website, anybody can access it. But you number your life from one to 10 and you figure out where you're like okay, I'm good. I don't need help in let's say relationship. But then let's say maybe in sex you're not great. So maybe you have a great relationship, but you're not happy in this area, which a lot of people don't want to talk about. It's funny when I do group calls and we get to that area a lot of people get a little squirmy. But I go into like, Are you truly happy with let's say how often you're having sex or are you truly happy with your career? Are you truly happy with yourself? And so this happiness activation looks at all eight areas of your life, and it helps you determine where you would possibly like to remain a little bit curious. And where would you like to dig a little bit deeper peel back those layers so that you can say, Okay, well, maybe I thought I was happy, but I don't I rated that as six. Well, why did I write that a six and you go a little bit deeper and a little bit deeper? That's really it.
That's really a good way to also see it more in black and white as you say. Because emotions can be very sometimes we can we can just I don't know they can mesh or mix one, or blend. Maybe that's the right word by overlap, and then they just blend one into the other. And then seeing it with numbers maybe gives you like a more a better assessment. Right? And I wanted to go into that with you a little bit more because sometimes I have noticed and also, you know, conversations with other guests, that there are certain words that they just resonate differently or people just get triggered by them in a different way. So I wanted to ask you if you have very deliberately use the word happiness instead of something else, like contentment, or fulfillment or something else that could be used instead of and can you elaborate on that? Because I'm very keen to know if happiness is really the barometer and why.
So in my research that I was doing, so many people are looking to be happy. Right? It is kind of the general word that people are seeking and so many of us, especially during the pandemic, got to see a whole different reality, right? Never did we ever think that we wouldn't see cars on the road or, you know, like it really shifted our reality of what is possible. And so, when we look at what is possible, if you actually look at the word impossible, it spells I'm possible. And so when you look at what's possible, and you start to have hope, right? It generates a feeling within you and most people would maybe describe it as excitement or something along those lines. But in general, I think people are seeking happiness in their life. And that can mean a variety. of different things to them. And that's why I don't define happiness as like joy or, you know, euphoric or anything. I actually define it as the opposite because what we're all seeking is going to be different. We need to actually look at our dark side in order to see the light.
That's true. That reminds me so much of like, what we talk about a lot, which is harmony, right? But it can define many things for many people and in harmony. That doesn't mean that you're completely you know, ecstatic in one area, but it's, it's like a hole. It's a big hole and many, many, many pieces come together to form that hole.
Now, I wanted to ask about the overlap a little bit when we look at these first of all, what are the eight areas of your life that you mentioned before?
Yes, so there's money sex, love- because love is different than sex- relationships, career, your life in general, your physical health and your mental health.
I love that. I like these categories very much. They're very, very well rounded
Exactly. We all want to have ideal- you say a seven or a 10 in all of those right?
And then like that you get to number and kind of rate them all separately because you're right. They each deserve our attention and our focus and our opportunity to dive deeper into because for a lot of them like Iva you said as well they mesh together right? Because it just reminded me of something my husband said says speaking of relationships, right? But I was kind of like not complaining but bringing up a few things. I was really craving a bit more time together. Now we just had a baby not too long ago, our second one and like he just said, “but look, it's just like the time now with the kids.” And I was like “But wait a second. There's still us. You know, we gotta look at that separately. I mean, yes, there's the kids and we're busier and our life is just too different.”
You rely on reliant, but there's also you're right,
Correct. It's like a different family dynamic. And we've got to respect that and I totally agree. But there's also us which I feel has its own segment that we need to nurture and take care of because in a couple of years those kids are out of the house, you know, and I mean a couple of longer years. But um, but then it's us again, just the two of us. I always feel it's so important, like you said to take all of these categories like then again you said your mental health and physical health. A lot of people mesh these together, but they're two entirely separate categories. So I love how you how you portray these.
Yeah, and a lot of what I end up talking about with the clients that I coach is, is boundaries, right? And what are your non-negotiables and so that's kind of where we start is their ideal desired life. What would it look like you know, so if I were to be coaching you right now, I would say okay, in your most perfect world, how often would you have protected time with your husband? And then we would go from there and let's say you said like, to date let's wait how many days a week or a month would you want to have protected time?
At least once a week? Okay. It depends. I can break it down like every day actually, every evening for example, where it's just really this this protect the time for us and like that protect the time. Yeah, every day, every day.
Okay, yes. So then I usually have the clients start small, okay, because if you go back, you're it's gonna get lost because we're busy. You've got to start small. And so then what you do is you say, I usually give you a parameter. So I'll say 15 minutes a day. I want you to designate protected time. And that can be when the kids are up, because it actually teaches them boundaries too, because as we model it's helping them so if you say mom and dad are gonna put a timer on for 15 minutes, the baby's asleep. Mom and Dad are gonna put a timer on for 15 minutes when the timer goes off that's when you can ask us a question. And that just starts building in a routine for them as well to learn about boundaries, right? And I use this language with my daughter and I say, “Honey, my energy's not right. I want to be here and present for you as much as I can. Can I have 15 minutes to be in my own space because your energy affects mine and I want to be able to give to you what you need, but I need to get I need to get right first?” And so she'll use that language to she's 10, and she'll say “Mom, my energy's not good.”
They learn how to do what they are watching you use them as reasons and I guess arguments for doing or not doing something they also apply it to themselves. And then they turn it on you when it's their turn. And I also think that that it's important that they also, this pressure like highlighting as you say this pressure that we tend to have bought into that we have to be I guess like on all the time in all areas almost like fireworks like everything has to be lighting up and that's not necessarily the case. So how do you approach or what are the things that people say okay, you know, when you call Yeah, maybe I am living the four to six life in these areas in this other ones. I definitely want to improve but in the other ones for certain reasons. I don't have the bandwidth or maybe they're not fully the priority or, you know, they can stay that way it's fine for the time being or is there a ratio where you say, this is more or less the aim that you should be going for to really feel as you say this connection to your purpose, this connection of truly feeling alive? And I guess activating your intuition in that sense, right? Because I kind of deduct and I'm probably putting words that you have not said yet, but you know, we don't ourselves through, you know, just, again, the same routine, the same things, and not really pushing out of that comfort zone into the unknown when we want to step into something different because we are wanting to make that change. And that's when I guess we start to get more connected to the signs to ourselves are emotions and intuition starts to heat a little bit differently.
Yeah, so many of us are dimming our lights, right. And many of us are not living in alignment with actually how we're designed so I'm not sure if you've heard of Human Design before. It is free on our website if anybody wants to get their alignment, life alignment map. We have two incredible experts Melissa and Allison from Guided Life By Design so you can go on in put your birth information and get your free map from them. I highly, highly recommended it has changed my life so much and my best friend so I am at what's called a generator. My best friend is a projector and
I'm a generator to you. I just found out this is very, very funny. And I just want to make this parenthesis because it we had this conversation actually yesterday with my husband out of the blue. I don't know he was showing me something, some assessment that he did. And then he said, “Oh yeah, you need to follow this person. And she does this thing with a Human Design” and “I'm like, Oh, so you you about HD?” He said yes and he sent me his chart. And I had always been wanting to know but I didn't know how to broach the subject with him. How to even explain. It turns out he's a projector.
So you and I have a lot in common because my best friend is a projector and I'm a generator and so our energies are very different. So this is how I typically approach when somebody has an area that they want to change, right? I need to know their human design because the way that you and I would approach that would be very different than our husband and your husband and my best friend right for our energy is almost on, we are the doers of the world. The projectors are the guides of the world. They are not really meant to do the doing like us and so to give them a task list or something along those lines that would overwhelm them and not be productive and so working with human design is really helpful for them to live in alignment with exactly how they're made. And so I work really closely with Allison and Melissa on understanding the best way for that person to reach that 7, 8, 9 or 10. Yeah,
So we've had Alison on the podcast and so it was amazing. It was it was great. And like I was gonna get my husband to do this.
Yeah, that was what I was definitely advocate and advice to
Yeah, to speak to you ladies and really get something very professionally done because, again, there's a lot of information right out there and we can really just get confused or mixed information. But one thing that I that I was reading in as generators. One of the main things is we're supposed to go to bed really tired, like we really need to exhaust our energy, right, we really need to make sure that it's fully depleted because we aren't going to get full tank for the next day. So it needs to be renewed. But a projector actually has to go to bed before they are fully tired like they really need to wind down a little bit earlier. So it's like I need to crash; my husband as a projector needs to have his you know, winding down space and those are the little things I guess that also start to make sense in the day-to-day right interactions and as you say as well, approaching of so many things, right? Raising family or doing tasks right we're also talking recently about that about getting help from husbands or you know, to what extent it is also their responsibility as well to take to take over certain things and so forth, but it is it is given a very added new dimension when you have the Human Design aspects. So yeah, that is fascinating. It's great. It's great to know,
And it plays a huge role in terms of everything relationship, love sex. You know what you were mentioning before if we just understand our partners that are those close to us those who are working together like our business besties Right, yeah, our business partners, our best friends. It's very helpful to approach situations in a different way.
Yeah. And when you're working with your design, and you're working with something you want to improve, so let's say it is relationships, right, and you want to improve your relationship with your spouse, when you know their design, and let's say you have an expectation and they're never going to be able to live up to it because it's not part of their design. So like let's say for my best friend, right, I want to improve that relationship. She doesn't have the energy that I do. And now that I know that about her, I don't have those expectations. And so it's permission for her to be who she is and I understand who she is now. So we don't have these conflicts of like, you know, because I'm the generator so she calls me the muscles and I'm helping her move furniture and do this and do that. She doesn't have that energy, so there's no reason for me to look at her as like lazy or unable to help because her true alignment is to guide Okay, can you move that furniture there? I'm the doer. Right, so it makes sense and like we can live in harmony, like you said,
Beautiful. Yeah, that's amazing. So what are the like sort of the advice then that you give now that we've identified sort of the happiness zone, and you figure out that a person is really in their four to six zone, right? And so how do you urge them then to look outside of that? Like, how do you guide them?
Yeah, so I like to keep as many resources as I can for free because I want them to be accessible to all and so start there. There are so many free resources on our website, start there. And as you get more curious and finding out more about yourself, you're gonna want to know more. And that's what the whole team is there for. So the Intuitive Life Hub has a hub of women who are there to help you from Kundalini Yoga, to coaching to Human Design to Reiki, everything so there's a hub of resources of women in there all over the world, all different types of sounds amazing, but also our magazine sovereign every month is connected to the full moon. And so each month like October is the Blood Moon which is all about relationships, and how are you putting your needs over the needs of others? Okay, so it's all about self-care. are you prioritizing que so all the women who have contributed to the magazine have written about how they do that, so everything from how they do it as entrepreneurs to moms to whatever, so that's also a free resource. So just start diving in to books, magazines, free resources, figure out what lights you up and follow your nudges. Follow your intuition, the guidance if you're feeling really aligned with something, keep going and keep remaining curious about yourself, where you're at where you want to go, what's your big vision? And truly, the main thing I tell people is how do you want to feel right? You may say, “oh, I want $10,000.” Right? But that's external. How do you want to feel with $10,000? That's what you're trying to find. Is that feeling, what is that feeling gonna give you? Oh, well, I can take 2000 of it and go on a trip. Okay. What's that trip going to give you? What feeling are you searching for? So, as we come back to the internal, you're gonna start tuning in again to yourself and what she is telling you, and that's what you start need to start listening to because it's really been turned off or completely muted.
Yes, so yeah, and I want to rescue something Nicole, that you said at the beginning, because I think it's very pertinent right now to what you were just mentioning of how I want to feel and it's also giving ourselves I guess, that grace and that permission, that just wanting to feel good all the time, right. It's also it can also take us down a road that is very unsustainable, because honoring the whole, right, the whole spectrum of emotions. There's a reason why we have them, and there's a time and a place to to feel them, heal them and to let them run their course without having to attach another layer to what does that mean, right? About myself, let's say in that moment that I'm feeling annoyed, angry, frustrated, upset, whatever it is, right, but just seeing Okay, yeah, this is this is what's coming up. It's, it's, it's an emotion, it's coming and it's going and it doesn't have to mean anything more or it doesn't need to define me in a in a negative way because I am feeling it or having it. And so I really love that how you linked it at the beginning to say you know, it does give you emotions give you the clues in you're able to start sorting out the more golden path and, and the and the journey ahead of you if you're able to allow them to come and guide you
Yeah, I have a saying that I created on my own. My body is my map and my feelings are my compass. So if you have an ache somewhere, that should be your first clue you need to start looking at your map. You have a pain Do you have a headache because your shoulder hurting us, Your back hurting us? Why is my right foot hurting? That's your first clue. I got to look at my map. When you're looking at your map, you generally need a compass to try to help figure out where you're going. Right right. Yeah. What are you feeling in that moment? What's coming up for you? Are you worried about something are you angry? Are you your if we want to call them something negative feelings are bad feelings are your compass towards something you're desiring?
Yes. And you may not know what it is and we need to figure that out. We need to you know, peel those layers like yet and that gives you something completely different.
Yeah, yes. Yes. So definitely holding the dualities. Whether we think about them as good feelings and bad feelings, or whether we think about it as fear and hope, or whether we think about it as joy and pleasure and frustration and anger whenever we need to learn how to hold both so that we can experience them both, right?
Yeah, yeah. Oh, what a lovely, you know, what a lovely intro into this whole phase of life where, as you say, if you have been feeling that you've been playing by the rules, right, and it's not even your own rules. It's that freedom to allow ourselves to say, Well, now, I can take over I can take charge, and I can make different decisions about it. I can also guide my life in a completely different direction. And I don't need to hold myself back. There's no one really holding me back. Other than myself now at this point, so it's a great way as well, to feel that empowerment to say, well, whatever was in the past and whatever led me up to this point. Okay, it's done cannot be undone, but moving forward and now I have more awareness as you say, there's, there's so much resources and, and through what you're doing, you know, there's, there's, there's a lot of, of great collaborators that are working alongside you bringing about information that can be such an eye opener and such a guiding light in those moments where you say, hey, what would be the next step for me then if this is not what I really want?
You're really choosing your golden path at that point when you start making intuitive decisions and remaining curious about yourself. You're choosing your path
Yeah. It's your guidance of knowing where to focus how to focus. When you have that like, like you said, the map in front of you, right, because often we don't know what is there something, an obstacle in my path, or something that we don't know where to focus, but I feel that this whole happiness zone now knowing exactly where to look what to work on to achieve that and create your own definition of what happiness means to you.
For sure, for sure, and is this is my goal or someone else’s right? To open up their life to not feel so constricted and conformed to a certain way to feel like they can blossom and breathe again. Right? How many of us are holding our breath, kind of hunched over, open your heart up, breathe again and feel into that life that is there for you to live?
Yes, what a lovely invitation is any call. So last question, we always you know, we always love to ask our guests and knowing that you're a mom, how do you define or what has worked for you and what can you advise our listeners when we're dealing with you know, yes, that aspect of wanting to we have this word balance, right being thrown around all the time, right? Work life balance, and having perfect balance, which we personally feel it's a little bit loaded, because it just carries a lot of things within that that just feel very artificial. So we rather use something more like harmony because it feels more like you flow with what is whatever that may be in the moment that is coming up. Right and it allows us as you say that expansion that open heart hardness to you know, what is and so we wanted to ask you, how do you keep your harmony up how do you go about cultivating for yourself that sense of what you said expansion, following your path, you're really what lights you up and allowing everyone else around you to be able to do the same in your capacity as a mom or a spouse or as a friend, or you know, a coach mentor, all of the things all of the roles that you do.
Yeah. So first I'm, I'm kind of one of those people that's an open book and very honest. And I think that you know, painting a picture that it's perfect every day is just unrealistic, right? Even though I have all these tools in my shed and I'm not perfect by any means. And I have good days and I have bad days and I you know have days where I'm not in tune with my design or I'm not living the things that I preach right. So I want to be very clear about that. But the thing that I do the most. So I check in with myself. What do I need in this moment? When I'm having a meltdown or I'm feeling tired or I'm feeling overwhelmed, whatever the feeling is, what can I give myself right now? That would help me entirely because when we take care of ourselves first, then we can take care of others. And that's what I have learned the most through this journey because as a nurse, what am I always doing right? Taking care of others. So that's the pattern I fell into just constantly giving, giving, giving, giving, and it depleted myself. So now I take care of myself first so that I can take care of others. So if I need that 15 minute nap or if I want to leave the dishes in the sink if that's truly what I'm desiring in that moment. I give it to myself, because then I find I'm actually more productive. I'm more happy, if you will. I'm more focused. I'm more present, right? And so trying to do it all. Is not healthy like this morning, just before my husband left for the gym. Yesterday I had said I take my daughter to swim lessons, but I have this I have a coaching call after this. And then I have another meeting at 930 that's going to be about two and a half hours. And then I'm going to have to come back we have to do our walk. I mean, there's like all these things right? And I said to him, I said you're gonna have to take her to swim lessons today. Because I'm going to be taxed. I know I'm going to need a nap before we walk. I need to follow up on some emails. I don't know how I'm going to fit all of this in whereas before I would push through. Yep. And I would just do it all because I'm a generator. And now I can speak up. I can delegate and I can not feel guilty about it. Not always, but most of the time and it's just a process and I want people to know it never stops. You're always going to have to be checking in with yourself and you're always gonna have to be working on it. And you're gonna say at some point, is this ever going to be over? And the answer is no. You're always going to have to work on something because you're going to be triggered. But just keep checking in with yourself the more you get to know yourself the more easy it gets.
Yeah, we're all works in progress. Thank you so much for that Nicole and we know that you have spoken about available resources you have right for anyone that really is interested but is there one in particular that you have for listeners today that you would like to share? And you would like them to invite them to check them out?
Yeah, so all of our free resources are at Intuitive Lifehubcom/free-resources So really easy if you just go on IntuitiveLifehub.com, then free resources are there. So that's all there for everyone but anybody who's listening who wants a 30 minute free coaching call I'm happy to help anybody and do 30 minutes with them and we can go over your life map together if you want.
That's beautiful. Thank you very much for that very generous gift. Yes, it's important that we all pay attention to that so much more it often gets lost in our busy lives. So thank you very much for drawing attention to it as well and for sharing with us everything that you do. And would you like to share with us a little bit what you are doing especially with the amazing magazine that you mentioned?
Oh my gosh, and I'm so excited. I hope you guys will be joining. So we have two more months of this year. So November and December. November is going to be let me just take a peek because we have it all divvied out here. So November is soul lessons. And then December is going to be the cold moon which is reflecting on the past year and then how to hold the dualities of you know whatever you experienced, but we have a brand new special exclusive that we just launched on Monday. We're going to it we weren't going to do a January issue but now we are so it's going to be the 23 Women to Watch in 2023 And so all those are open and we are recruiting for that. So if anybody is interested in being in that it would be amazing. And we just gained four new countries. So up to 25 countries we're in are ready. We were added Senegal, Greece, South Africa and Trinidad and Tobago so this last month so yes,
That is amazing. That's a great wave of expansion And it's so needed. So Nicole we just, I mean we could continue talking of course. Definitely want to thank you so much for chatting with us today. And if you want to connect with Nicole, we can find her on Instagram @IntuitiveLifehub, and Facebook. We also have her website and her LinkedIn links as well. And it's all available along with the resources that she mentioned, her free resources, the links, all of that. We're going to share it in our show notes. So thank you so much, Nicole, for being here with us today.
Thank you so much and the magazines free for everyone. So go subscribe!
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Nicole George, Editor-in-Chief for the global magazine SOVEREIGN and founder of The Intuitive Life Hub, realized in 2020 she was traveling down, what she calls, The Unchosen Path. A path that had been formulated and constructed by others’ rules, expectations, beliefs and stories. This in essence informed her perception of life and ‘current reality’. It wasn’t until she serendipitously fell into the world of intuition, internal guidance, and Universal co-creation that she awakened to re-aligning herself to travel down, what she calls, her Golden Path. Now through SOVEREIGN and The Intuitive Life Hub she supports women to stand in their power, claim their truest essence, and find their Golden Paths.
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